15 lies Women tell Men!

There is an old saying, a “white lie” is not a real lie. Well that may be so but it still has not stopped many couples the world over from lying to their “better half” daily! In this two part article series I am going to be looking at the top 15 lies men and women tell each other.

Article one: The women! Common lies women will tell men

Number one:

“No, really. I wouldn't change a thing about you!”

Man “I think I have put on weight during the holidays, belts a notch further”

Woman “Arw, no you haven't your perfect I wouldn't change a thing about you. Honest!”

This is normally followed by the thought “apart from...” but they never say it. Although this can be said sincerely most of the time there will always be one thing, even a tiny thing that your partner would love to change about you!

Number two:

“You love Football! Me too!”

Yes, I know women all over the world enjoy watching and playing sports. But they are few and far between when it comes to the ladies in general. Many will simply say this to start conversation or in an attempt to have some quality time. Even if your eyes are fixed on the screen.

Number three:

“I don't know where it is, no. I have not thrown it out”

Guy's this is code for, better go check the trash cans.

Man “Have you seen my signed photo of Angelina Jolie?”

Woman “No. Not recently. I don't know where it is, I don't think I have thrown it out”

From common household items to treasures in a man's eyes. Your favourite things thought lost were most likely tossed out either by accident or on purpose!

Number four:

“Oh it's only natural. I don't mind you looking at other women”

Guy's if you believe this you are either in an open relationship or a lot of trouble when you get home!

Many will be quick to deny it. But most women get jealous easily or angry should they catch you checking out others as they pass. This is simply because it is rude!

Number five:

“I really don't care how much you make. It's being with you I want. We could be poor for all I care!”

This is another one which could be true, but most of the time in the younger generation its far from the truth. What the woman is really thinking is “Looks like I'm getting a second job” Or at least something close to that.

Number six:

“I love to spend time with your Mum and Dad!” (Or Mom)

Man “Are you sure your going to be okay this weekend?”

Woman “Sure, I love spending time with your parents”

Most of the time thinking, oh crap another “fun” filled weekend with the in laws from hell.

Number seven:

“Yeah, I don't mind. Let me pay” - On a date, Birthday or anniversary

What is the one thing you should never do guy's? Well that would be ask or let the lady in your life pick up the tab on a date, Birthday or your own anniversary! What they really mean by this is.

Date

“Won't even pay for the meal, some gentleman he is”

Birthday

“It's my Birthday for crying out loud, why should I pay?”

Anniversary

“After all this time, he still won't pick up the bill. Next one better be diamonds.”

Number eight:

“No, I'm not mad at you. I'm fine”

The big number eight, men in a relationship or even just a female family member will of said this to them at least once in a given week.

Run to the hills!

This is code for “I'm fine, you won't be” think back quickly, she says one thing but means another. What could you of done! How can you fix it? Flowers, chocolates, hugs? Better think quick before you find the reason from her!

Number nine:

“You're the best I have ever had, you know that?”

….apart from....

Second only to Number ten. This can be true, but in the early days of a relationship its a verbal kick in that region!

Number ten:

“Don't worry, it happens to lots of guys. I'm sure its a one off. Don't worry...”

Trouble in the bedroom

I am sure you know what I am getting at here. When the soldier fires without permission from the Captain! What she actually means is, “Well that was quick” or something close to those lines!

Number eleven:

“It was not that expensive, really. I got it on sale!”

I would be happy to place money on it that you don't see the next bank statement that comes into the house guys!

Number Twelve:

“I won't be mad if you say I look fat in this, honestly. I just want your opinion.”

Women: “Just trying on some pants my sister let me borrow, what do you think? Too tight?”

Man “Yeah, just a bit...”

Whatever you do, lie! Yes I explain this well in the top 15 lies a man will tell you. But guys, for the love of peace lie! This covers all areas of “does my ass look big in this” and everything like that. She just said she won't be mad, but please go back up and read Number eight again, as that is where anything but a compliment will lead!

Number Thirteen:

“That's fine, I don't mind your friends coming over. They make me laugh, have a good time”

...or meaning “Why, they were only here last week and I am still cleaning up the mess!”

Man: “Hey, guys are coming over to watch the game. That okay?”

Woman: “Sure it is, I love having them over!”

Sometimes true, if they are family friends or she knows them personally. But if its just the guys from the bar. You may want to watch your back for the next day or two!

Number fourteen:

“Size doesn't matter to me, it's all about how you use it”

Well sure, if its a pencil we are talking about....

This is an obvious and age old lie. It's not about how you use it at all! - Go back and check Number one for more details!

Finally number fifteen:

“How did you know, it's just what I always wanted!”

You know that feeling, its her Birthday. Christmas or the anniversary. You have been shopping, sure last minute but it's the thought that counts right. You rush home to give her your gift. Met with a delayed smile and the famous lines “Arw, it's just what I always wanted” sure this can be true, if you are quick about what you do. But in many cases, come back a month later and try to find the gift and you will likely find a new item and a store credit receipt!